[Cyn]

I am a single, no kids, 45 years old woman and I have a stable job but would like to move on. Some days I am confident and consider all my options, keep on learning new skills, so I can do this and that…And suddenly it hits me…my AGE! I look about 30-35 yo and hang out with young people so I tend to forget…

What if banks won´t give me a mortgage to invest in a flat? (I have great credit, savings and salary) What if I can´find another job as I approach or past 50? Like what do I need to have in place before I turn 50?

-I can see already how the dating scene is a sh*t show at my age- The most capable and experienced, while cool and fun colleagues around me are the 50+ crowd but we know how the world is discriminating…

[Michael]

Age based discrimination is real, but not equally distributed among professions. In some professions, they pay for decades of experience and value folks who have “been there, done that”. In others, your career expires well before you do. Age based discrimination for a mortgage (at least in the U.S.) is illegal. My in-laws in their mid 70’s got a mortgage recently and folks well past the half century mark get mortgages frequently. I’m no help on dating, but after 3 decades of marriage…I’d be as lost as a goose in a snowstorm.

[Amy]

Discrimination in the workplace depends on your profession. I thought I’d never get a well-paid job again after I quit at 52 but here I am enjoying a great new job – better than most of jobs I’ve ever had. I got a signing bonus, was able to negotiate for more vacation and got the employer to match my last salary. It just so happened my experience is not commonly available since most of my peers went on to do other things or were promoted to management.

I chose to not be in management because managers are not well compensated in my line of work.

As for dating in your 50s, I like to say “The good men are still married. The good enough ones who are not are looking for women half their age.”

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[Erin]

I am 46. I work in an industry in which almost everyone is a woman, and almost everyone is older than me. Very few young people to replace the older people who are about to retire. There is a huge shortage of us! So we are all super duper valuable. Clients don’t care what our age is. They are desperate to find us and put us to work. Try to get creative and find a job where you will be indispensable? Did you say where you live? You said “flat,” so I’m assuming Europe?

I live in CA, and all you need is to prove you have 3 times the income of whatever you are renting. To buy a house, you need 20 percent down for a normal loan, and have to show financial docs to prove you can afford the loan. Don’t know the standards where you are…As for dating, I wouldn’t even worry about that, if you live in a big city or near a big city. You can go online and meet just about anyone you want. Older people use dating apps and meet people all the time. And yeah…you may have to date someone older than you, but I don’t see that as a bad thing?

Since I live in CA, my biggest fear/concern about finances and getting old is definitely HEALTH INSURANCE. And who is going to care for me when I’m at the end of my life. I have two boys.

Are they going to take me in and let me move in with them and care for me if my husband dies first? Or are they going to stick me in a home? Who is going to pay for that facility?

They are so expensive and sometimes not the best care….So silly the things we think about when we are only in our 40s, ha!

[Tony]

I’m going to give you the same advice I give my daughters that are just graduating college….don’t ever eliminate or turn yourself down. If other do it, that’s on them. You just be the best you that you can be, because that’s awesome and amazing!

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[Author]

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