[USER]

Anyone know how to get out of the frugal mindset for themselves when they have the money?

I’m 56 and just crossed the $5m threshhold (1.3m cash/stocks, remainder in IRa/RE. In addition, I make $160k via W-2.

In a million years, never thought I’d be anywhere close to this and just doesn’t seem real.

Theres also the (unrealistic) fear of losing it all
I understand ‘life is too short’, which I agree and have dealt with as I lost my wife a few years back unexpectedly when she was in her late 40s.

Don’t get me wrong, I spend money but really not on myself. I actually spend more on my kids than myself but they are all self sufficient.

I’ll actually look on fb marketplace to save $30. It doesn’t make sense.

I’m sure I get some ‘poor yous’ and I get that.

Just trying to adjust my thinking and see if anyone else did so successfully.

[Jill]

I will never blow money. My goal is legacy for my family and taking care of the less fortunate.

Anything I don’t spend during my life helps others.

I enjoy myself and travel but remaining frugal helps my family and others, which makes my soul happier than spending money ever could.

Feel free to stay your course if you choose to.

[Joe]

Go and buy something expensive. Today. $100k. A painting. A porsche. A classic car.

A 60k first class vacation.

A holiday home in Nicaragua. An airplane, or flight lessons. ToDaY.

Go large. The first time is the hardest.

[Julie]

I’m in similar situation. 55. Work for myself. Having a hard time even working less.

I block out days off, then open them back up.

I watch networth daily.

When a car or home repair comes up, I think about work to cover it.

Hard to imagine drawing down.

[Alex]

Plan a big family trip or something and pay for everyone

[Vivienne]

We re in a similar situation. Nothing wrong with being frugal with day to day things.

But if you have a passion such as travel don t skimp or hold back.. If somethings going to improve life for you at home get it.

If theres a hobby you have always wanted to try do it.

If you d love to financially help your kids, help with the grand kids education or treat the family go for it.

But if you re happy buying budget brand whatever or driving a trusty older car then who are others to criticise.

[Aaron]

I like to use my budget to give myself permission to spend more in different areas.
If it’s planned for then I feel better about spending it all.

Consider starting with things that you love to do yourself.

A hobby, activity, vacation.

Then look for ways to spend a little more to try out a different experience and see how you like it.

If you used to get lawn seats at a concert, try buying seats.

If you always fly coach, get economy plus.

As you get more comfortable doing it over time it will get easier.

[Gonzalo]

There’s a lot of talk around how to save and invest money but not much at all on how to spend it.

Yes, it’s a mindset adjustment.

I found a couple of things helpful.

The first is this idea of money dials by Ramit Sethi.

You spend (within your means, of course) on the things that truly bring you joy…without guilt.

And you don’t spend frivolously on the things that don’t. But you have to identify those dials.

See the link that I shared.

I also found the book “The Power of Fun” by Catherine Price a good read, helping me to identify those things that bring me joy.

I had heard about it on a couple of podcasts.

[Cindy]

Take some time to explore what you might enjoy. A hobby, travel — generally developing a passion for something will help.

If it makes you feel better enjoying a hobby, rest, a passion, can generally make you a more productive person so it could also help you make more money, if you’re one of those people that needs to feel like there’s a practical means to an end.

If nothing else, take some time investing in your health and wellness.

That’s never a bad way to spend money.

[Sandy]

You aren’t unique. I am an advisor and see this all the time with my clients.

The same habits and mindset that got you where you are still exist and difficult to turn them off.

Try to be intentional about the things you enjoy and the things that matter to you.

Set up accounts for the grandkids, arrange for family vacations, identify causes/people that matter to you and donate, etc

[Nicki]

Determine what you value. What have you dreamed about doing? Any big bucket list trips/experiences?

Is there a private club you could join locally that would help you make more like-minded friends your age?

Mentally remove just $100k from that $5m – will you still be fine? Then find a fun/rewarding way to spend it.

Not on stuff you don’t value, but on something you desire and now deserve!

You could also use some of it to privately invest in people starting businesses (looking for someone myself!), which helps them get a start toward generating wealth and gives you more return as well!

[Josh]

It’s hard to get out of the mindset that got you here in the first place.

I will constantly find myself at the grocery store analyzing the price per ounce of food

For kids/vacations.

I saw a TikTok about how you argue with kids about happy meals and the waste of 30% on small ticket items but really it’s only $2-3 each time but can become more of a bigger argument.

And that if you add it up.

Maybe it’s $1k over the child’s lifetime and how it’s not really worth it.

That helped me change how I take Disney trips. I just say.

I’m budgeting $20k to make my kids trips more memorable and so we can enjoy this time better (this is on top of the the already $$$ spent just to get there).

For myself. My previous coworker was diagnosed with terminal brain cancer and he was 1 year from retirement/pension (he was told 2-3 mths to live).

So I’m spending a good chunk of money on fun toys.

New dirtbike, standup jetski, s1000rr, used motorhome.

I’m investing on me “living”.

My dad is 82 and he’s got a rare 94 two. Turbo Supra which had 18k miles on it (car nuts know the value of this car).

I always told him to drive it very little. Now I’m like. Fuck it dad.

Drive the shit out of it.

Enjoy it
I think it’s good to learn to be frugal to save I.

The early years; becuAse true enjoyment can be very cheap. But when you hit a certain threshold.

It’s healthy I think to shift your mindset.

Enjoy the fruits of your labor/thriftiness.

[Christina]

Nothing wrong with that mindset at all.
My husband is a self made multimillionaire and he doesn’t like to spend money on himself.

He is content with life and doesn’t need much to be happy.

He’d spend money on me for anything I want and he gets joy out of seeing me happy and I am not going to complain and try to change that.

He likes to treat himself to a nice cup of coffee and he’d spend money on our comfort and experiences.

I grew up with money and have no problem spending money, but I enjoy finding deals and not paying full price for things.

I am not going to change that just because I can afford to pay more.

[Betsey]

Maybe try reading the book “Die with zero”. Its all about making that adjustment.

[FuangYing]

My daughter has a “fun money” budget. While it is her budgeting tool, maybe you can start from here and using it as a “treating yourself” (or whatever account.

Enjoy!

[MT Ailuropoda]

It’s a muscle. Needs to be exercised. Building muscle memory.

And then finding the right balance between spending and saving.

Setting a budget for what you can do freely with no impact to your overall financial health, annually, monthly, etc., will provide you peace of mind on what you can spend within reason.

[Author]

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