[USER]

Buying a house with parental help: We have a parent that is generously offering to help us with around $100k towards a home.

We are debt free, great credit and earn enough to qualify for the homes we are looking at on our own.

Dad may be moving in with us as he’s aging and may need help in the next 5-10 years and seems to be unsure of how to contribute …

whether he should be on the mortgage, let us qualify on our own and give us help for the home after, or, commit to a dollar amount now for when we apply.

If you’ve had a relative help you with a down payment- how did you incorporate them in the process?

[Rick]

Do you have $100k you would use in the home purchase and then “repay” yourself with your dad’s money at a later date?

I am trying to understand if this is or is not a net zero impact to the mortgage balance you will have once you buy the house.

[Ron]

It sounds like dad expects to get paid back? If so, a notarized loan agreement dictating the details of what happens in the event of a sale, divorce and/or his death should be spelled out IN DETAIL.

In the event of a divorce, no matter how remote, how will the equity split happen?

Does the $100k accrue as the wife’s equity? Tge hubbies?

In the event if his death, is the debt forgiven?

In the event the couple decides to upgrade to a new home, does the debt then become due with the father being paid back?

[Jessica]

Do you need Dad’s $100k to “get” the home? You mention you’re debt free, have great credit and earn enough to “qualify”.

But then you also mention things like Dad is “unsure of how he should contribute …

whether he should be on the mortgage…let us qualify on our own…give us help for the home after…or commit to a dollar amount now for when we apply”.

Your information doesn’t disclose your age, current salaries, your savings/retirement funds, etc.

If you’re in a great place financially, then (if it were me) rather than accept Dad’s generous $100k offer to go towards the house, I would put it towards any future care that Dad may need.

You mentioned that he’s getting older, “may” be moving in with you in 5-10 yrs, etc.

but you never know what future needs may arise.

With an aging parent, I would be looking out for Dad more than myself.

[Scott]

Does your dad need the money to take care of himself first? I think it is incredibly well meaning that he wants to help, and speaks well of you as well that you are willing to take him in.

However in these situations I would say for the parent as they say on planes ‘put on your own mask before helping those around you’.

t might be better for him to stay liquid and if he wants to support he can give you $x a month (whatever you agree between you and him) to help with food/cable bill etc.

[Katie]

Talk to your mortgage lender. There is a process that your Dad can send it straight to them with a letter (don’t remember the wording) that makes it a smoother process.

[Beth]

My son’s mortgage company had a one page letter that I had to sign, date, name the account and the amount.

I also had to confirm that it WAS a gift.

[Miranda]

Talk to an elder law attorney in your State about how to properly set this up.

There are many things to consider.

[Allison]

Transfer the money now. When you apply for mortgages they will ask for 3 months of statements and it’s easier if the money is already “seasoned”.

Other way is get the house on your own and then once you have a mortgage he pays $100,000 directly to the mortgage company as a principal payment.

[Stacy]

You can get the money now, just have your father provide you with a GIFT letter.

Stating it does NOT ever need to be repaid.

The bank will want to see that.

houldn’t be a problem.

I would NOT put him on the mortgage or title, if it were me.

[Author]

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