[JAD]

.. Start my dream magazine (I’ve had a successful magazine in the past) and split my time between Texas and ND (where my other kids are.) Winters in TX- Summers in ND.

The trip offered me clarity that is invaluable. Thank you so much for the permission, advice and love.

Y’all watch out!  I’m back on track! Thank you!

This might be too far removed from FI. If so. I understand. Warning: upsetting details.

I’ve posted before about moving out of my little house in podunkville, WY. I had a walkthrough scheduled for Sunday the 5th. Local ranchers had cash in hand, ready to pay asking price to buy it for their aging mom.  I felt like things were finally coming together.

I’ve paid off $4k in credit cards the last 4 months and the house sale was the final step to freedom and out of this cold and miserable state.

Saturday I got a phone call from my brother who is the only cop out in the small town I’m from.  He had been asked to do a well check on my tenant and wondered if I had keys stashed out there.

I said no, but I would bring them.

The roads were terrible and it took about an hr to get out there.

As I pulled up… the tenants son also pulled up.

My brother entered my house. The son entered the house and ran out screaming. I will never ever forget this.

My tenant shot himself in the back bedroom 2 days prior.

He was 2 months behind on rent. I told him not to worry about it- no late fees, just find a new place to live so I could sell it.

And now… I’m cleaning up and distraught and alone and miserable.

I am fighting the urge to rent a car and just drive somewhere warmer…. break down (me, not the car) and figure everything out.

It feels irresponsible. My job offers no leave or sick days. I almost don’t care if I get fired.

I would have to put it on my credit cards that I just paid off.

I live with my sister, so no privacy really and not ideal situation.

Was so close to freedom.

I just feel like I can’t take much more.

Why I’m asking strangers for permission to spend $250 on a rental car and disappear for a few days… I don’t know.  You all seem to be headed on the right track, so I value your input.

I rented a car… asked for a cheap Corolla – they upgraded to a Challenger for free (uhm. Those things can move!) I took a week off work and drove from WY to TX to see my kids.  I cried at the first sight of green grass (Florence and the Machine’s “Dog Days are Over” was playing at the time.) And it’s bluebonnet season.   I got hugs from my adult boys- grand daughter time and sunshine.

I have 2 buyers interested in my house- even with the recent trauma.

If anything… it feels good to unload.  Thank you.

[Kathleen]

Homeowners insurance claim for the clean up and possibly lost rent depending on your policy. This needs to be handled by a professional.

[Cheryl]

This sounds like a really tough experience to be handling on your own. My heart goes out to you. To answer your direct question, spending money for your mental health is a good expenditure. However, making rash decisions based on a major life event will almost always bring regret later.

I say this from the experience of a widow to suicide. I would first speak to your boss about unpaid leave, even if just for a few days. Next I would find a professional to clean the house. Yes, this will likely be expensive, but it will be worth that expense.

Is it something your insurance might cover? And then as others have said, keep those receipts and get the house back on the market. It should still sell and you should be able to leave it behind you.

I second the recommendation to ask the funeral home or officers if they know of a crisis line or center where you can talk some things through with a professional.

That will go a long way to helping you handle the level of stress you are under right now.

[Teresa]

You should qualify for QMLA if you worked enough hours in the year…. Get a dr note to take a couple weeks off , mental health is health and at least a Dr note w make them pause… tell them what happened and take the time off by properly calling in per policy. If your. Company has a hr department, call them as well and tell them what you need/give dr note to them as well.

Hire a professional company to clean crime scenes… you should not clean it….

If you are a believer, youtube Joyce Meyer or someone like her, trauma/ dealing with hard times etc. Listen to a show every morning…

Let’s stay in check, money is not worth this kind of stress…. Your health is more important than money and that house will sell, just a little ugly delay but it w sell!

And remember… if you are a believer, God is in charge not you, he controls the plan and his plans are better than ours… give yourself time to heal and let this work itself out as all hard things do and if we let them , in our favor. Praying for you, take care of yourself #1….

[Carrie]

Ask your brother to find someone to clean the house up. Hopefully this doesn’t impact the sale. I would also actually call your local United way to find someone to talk to. Running away for a weekend is also perfectly fine. This is just a detour on your journey. It sucks but as my favorite animated fish says, “Just keep swimming!”

[Jess]

Money comes and money goes. A few hundred, even a few thousand isn’t going to make or break your FI goals but a mental break could have a greater impact not only on FI but on your overall well-being. Your health is more important than any monetary goal, possession or obligation ALWAYS! Take care of you.

[April]

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. The first person I would contact is your insurance company. You do NOT have to be cleaning up from this. It is a biohazard that you should not touch. Second, everyone is correct take the time you need. Your physical and mental health need to be a top priority. I wish you good luck going forward.

[Carol]

First, I am so I am so very sorry for what you are going through. The tenant’s death alone is a lot and you obviously have other major stressors as well.

Second, money means nothing if you do not have your mental health in tact. Speak to your employer and explain what has happened and that you need a few days off to process this trauma. $500 on a credit card is not going to wreck your entire financial future.

Third, although these specific buyers may not choose to move forward, the house is not unsellable. I have been in real estate for 16 years and have personally sold a home where two such events occurred. Hire someone to property clean it all up, save your receipts, and then get it sold so you can move on {on all fronts}. If nothing else, speak to an investor who owns rental property as they are likely buyers.

[Author]

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