[USER]

Hey everyone. 36 year old guy living in California. Unfortunately my wife and I have come to an agreement that divorce is the best course of action for us.

We have pretty much agreed to the financial terms of the divorce. She doesn’t have a job and I have agreed to support her for a bit.

What would be the cheapest way to proceed with this? Do I need to involve a lawyer?

[Shannon]

My friend is having a paralegal do their paperwork because they have also agreed to all of the terms and don’t need a lawyer.

[Ankur]

Go through a Lawyer….I am also getting divorced and we have been amicable, but you don’t want to mess around with this.

[Justin]

Use a mediator, who is normally a lawyer that you both share.

what’s friendly now can go south on a dime – so wrap it up legally ASAP while things are friendly.

Good luck, this process sucks but you’ll get through it.

[Rick]

Determine the timeframe that your spouse can come back with additional lawsuits specific to your division of assets and (essentially) alimony.

What is amicable today can turn otherwise when the now ex spouse has people chirping in their ear saying they should have gotten more and still can get more.

That would concern me in your shoes.

But outside of that, avoid the lawyers, agree upon things, document them, keep documentation that you complied with everything and move on.

Good luck and I hope you put this chapter behind you asap and move on to better times.

[Brian]

Having meditated a divorce I feel like even if you don’t think you need a lawyer you should 100% get one.

[Ashley]

You wont need a lawyer. I’m not sure if every county is the same, but in my county once you file, you’ll be assigned to a court appointed mediator who will go through the paperwork with you just to make sure all terms are clear, understood and agreed upon, then they will get it to the judge to sign and you’ll receive the official decree by mail.

[Tami]

I was divorced many years ago and had 1 young child. As broke as I was and as amicable as we were at first, I would always recommend a lawyer.

You don’t know what you don’t know.

I had one, he did not.

[Jacquie]

How long is a bit? One year, two years? A few months? Are you initiating? Or is she? Is her insurance thru your employer?

Could you do a legal separation until the bit has ran out? Are there kids?

[Rosemarie]

Your courthouse should have a basic legal aid office that will provide you with the forms you need and explain the process. They might even have it all online now with instructions, have you looked?

We did our own after 20 years, with kids. Just create an agreement, and fill out all the forms. They are self-explanatory.

The judge in our case did make us appear for about 10 minutes just to make sure no one was being coerced or anything.

Filing fees were a few hundred bucks. (CA)

[Jessica]

Hello Divorce out of Berkeley might be a good resource for you. They help you meditate your way through an amicable divorce.

[Endri]

Avoid the lawyer if you can come to a full agreement, just set the contract together and do the court form applications yourself.

The divorce application will have everything you wanna share and how.

[Rachel]

After how many years? After 10 she’s entitled to alimony for life

[Kora]

I used a paralegal with my divorce. just really take time to think about every aspect.

if you don’t have children it could be a bit more simple. it saved a lot of money and time

[Joan]

Do you have children?
How will you cover her with insurance after the divorce?

[Kelly]

You need to have a signed agreement. With firm deadlines. Use a mediator. Both Sign Agreement docs.

And let them file the divorce paperwork.

[Reva]

Using Hello Divorce in CA. I like that they make sure all the forms are done/correct. Can be as low as $3-4k including filing fees.

[Author]

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